Posted by Anonymous on 2018/11/23 under Kids God,
How and when have I used Suicide to manipulate, guilt and force others into attaining my will, rather than directing myself towards Gods will? How have I hurt others by using my addiction to suicide and the behaviors therein? Please reveal to God the emotional frequency that I have used to get my way, to manipulate a situation and to warp the understanding I have of exisstential-existence.
Silently Anonymous,
The Archer
People affected by my suicidal behavior:
Sona
Penny
M.
Tyler
Gretchen (the fragment moment when I was trying to break into M.’s purse and Gretchen was blocking my way and kept saying no. And how upset I was. So forth.)
Cathy
Doris
Dad
Mr. Russell
Me! Myself! + I!
People who might’ve inspired me into the experiential addiction to suicide;
Camus, Albert
M.
Artaud, Antonin
Plath, Sylvia
Sexton, Anne
Danielewski, Mark
O’Brien, Penny
Wallace, David
Walling, Becca
Critchley, Simon
(just depression in general, which is supposedly a no-fault illness). (I am not to blame and I am not alone.)
Chubbuck, Christine
Klebold, Dylan
(the question of, do people have the right to take their own existence in their hands? Whose right is it? Unreligiously? Is God in the non-church state of world?)
Murphy, Brittany (in girl, interrupted)
Ledger, Heath
Cobain, Kurt
Arbus, Diane
(the 27 Club)
Hoffman, Phillip
New York, Synecdoche
Club, Fight
Survivor
Leaves, House
Monsters, Invisible
Dream, Requiem
Choke
Cruelty, Theater
Double, Theater
Burton, Tim
Pastas, Creepy
Christmas, Nightmare
Scissorhands, Edward (will be forever misunderstood, meant to dwell in a fortress of solitude, so forth.)
Juice, Beetle
Institutions or projects above that might’ve led me to a suicidal ideology: (above)
Rilke, Rainer
Vollman, William
The burning monks